Exclusive Excerpt from Shelter in Place
by Simon Strange
“Dude, do I need to kick the door in? Are you okay in there or what?”
Not my imagination! I yelped as I startled, and my iPad tipped off my knee. I grabbed for it with my right hand on instinct, but the lotion made my fingers slick, and it only slowed before it took the plunge. In a sudden panic I lurched forward off the toilet lid to grab it with my left. My jeans, which were around my ankles, trapped my legs—and while I did manage to get a hand on the other side of the iPad, I had already lost my balance.
I toppled sideways, crashed into the bathtub as I tried to catch myself on my shoulder, and barked “Fuck!” as I banged my knee against the tile floor.
“The fuck is going on, Cal?”
“Fine!” I shouted. “I’m fucking… I’m fine I just… I slipped, it’s good, you’re good, don’t… don’t kick the door down or something I—I’m fine, I’ll be out in a second.”
I heard his footsteps leaving the door, at least, so he wasn’t about to come charging in. But he had to think I was… I don’t know, having a stroke or something.
Or, hell—maybe he thought I was jerking off. It’s not like he didn’t have a cock of his own to deal with from time to time, at least.
I grumbled more curses at myself as I carefully heaved off the floor and set my iPad aside and safely away from the mess that I’d clearly become. I washed my hands, wiped down my dick which was just going to have to wait, and made sure to clean up any place I’d accidentally grabbed with my slick hand as I crashed.
When I finally emerged, I had my iPad under my arm and tried to casually slip it back onto the couch.
No such luck.
“Right,” Ross said from the kitchen as I turned around and tried to act like nothing at all had just happened. His eyes were on the couch. “Okay, so… look, I totally get it but like… just do that in the shower or something? And clean the drain after.”
Heat flushed through my neck and face. “I was just… job searching. While I was on the pot.”
He raised critical eyebrow. “Sure. Okay. Well, anyway— there weren’t a lot of options. I got a bunch of canned chili, a bag of flour—whole wheat, it’s all they had. Sugar. Canned pasta stuff—ravioli, speghettio’s, shit like that. No eggs at the store, no milk—and no toilet paper so just like, only use two sheets at a time or just hop in the shower afterward or some- thing. Definitely don’t waste tissue jerking off.”
“Okay,” I muttered. “You’re fixated at this point. I wasn’t jerking off.”
He blinked, and the corner of his mouth twitched in a smile that he managed to resist. “Whatever you say man. It’s natural. Everybody does it, or they lie about doing it. You’re cool, just don’t waste toilet paper, deal?”
“Yeah, alright,” I breathed. “Deal.”
I looked over the collected of cans spread out over the counters and the narrow ‘dining room’ table that was typi- cally unused. It was a lot. But it was hard to say if it looked like an extra two months of food. I reached for a can.
“Whoa,” Ross snapped, and swatted my fingers away. He put a bottle of sanitizer and a handful of rags on the counter in front of me. “Step one. Every time. Understood?”
I picked up the sanitizer and swallowed a groan. “Step one, every time. Understood, sir.”
Ross shook his head and picked up a can with one rag and sprayed it down. I started as well.
I don’t know. Maybe Lawrence was right to think it was all ridiculous. This certainly was.
About Shelter in Place
I hadn’t planned on living with Ross very long. I just needed a place to stay to get on my feet after a bad break up, and happened to be friends with his sister. But when the shelter in place order comes down, not only do I lose any chance of finding my own space; my bartending job dries up, too.
And Ross is taking this order very seriously. He grew up in a family of Montana doomsday preppers, and his rules are very clear: we’ve got three months of food, and neither of us is leaving—for any reason.
I don’t have a ton of money, and there are bills to pay. But there are a few different ways to make some cash online—especially when the rest of the world is shut inside, too, and need something to entertain them. Who would have imagined I would end up on a cam site entertaining guys from all over the world just by being myself and having fun? So long as I wait until Ross goes to sleep before I log on, anyway—I definitely do not want him to know what I’m up to on his couch.
But Ross is full of surprises, it turns out. And I guess I am too. Because what I end up sharing with him is something I’ve never shared with anyone before. I just worry that things are about to get very complicated. Because every gay boy knows the cardinal rule:
Never, ever fall for the straight guy.
Available at: Amazon
About Simon Strange
Simon Strange loves coffee, red wine, craft beer, and men. Especially men. Especially the men you should never, ever screw…
What is it about the forbidden that gets our blood hot? Is it just the rebellious instinct to do what we’re told is wrong? Those men we grew up with, the ones that were either always looking over us or always by our side—or chasing us around—the ones that say they don’t want us, and would never ever… well, just this once, if you don’t tell…
So that’s what you get from Simon Strange. Stories of the forbidden, of the filthy, and the naughty, and the never-ever-tell, and of course, the strange. With nearly 150 reviews for his collection of erotica and romance, and an average of four and a half stars across the board, you’ll almost certainly find something you like in the pages of his work.
Just be sure to bring a change of undies. 😉
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